Shame in Oregon

Ah, Oregon, state of my birth. Settled mostly by land by middle European immigrants of deep and suspicious conservatism, it nonetheless has been a leader in so many humanitarian and hands-off-the-people-unless-they're-frightening-the-horses social progresses that I am currently ashamed - and it takes a lot to shame me.

That Oregon can recognize individuals' rights to die whenever they want to yet not recognize their right to marry and be subsequently made miserable by whomever they want to, strikes me as deeply contradictory. Once years ago, when the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan scandal was at its peak, a journalist described Clackamas county - Harding's home - as harboring a deep well of meaness (words to that effect - I can't find the exact quote, which should have been written by George Vecsey but I can't prove it) - I felt a visceral yearning to agree with him. Now I feel that same yearning to agree with all those who sneer at Oregon as benighted, behind the times, inhumane and generally clueless.

Massachusetts, Connecticut, Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine and Iowa, of all places, are miles ahead, while Oregon potters and frets along under the burden of its goofy 2004 constitutional amendment. Oregon does offer domestic partnership registration for same-sex couples, but it's not the same. Again, why should gay people get off so lightly? Let them suffer the wedding-dress trauma, the cake trauma, the who to invite when they haven't spoken to each other in 15 years trauma, the fighting in the parking lot during the reception trauma, and then who gets the Dylan albums, who gets the Jack Russel terrier, and can we keep the rings or sell them.

Grow up, Oregon. I mean. IOWA??